Mans conquest why marry a virgin

Men are not typically stigmatized by their sexual conquests while promiscuous women are often cast in a negative light. It means a lot to me that my wife was a virgin when we married. She saved herself as a gift to the man she would marry. And, I am honored that I could give the same thing back to her. For you, the key is to give the gift of monogamy to one another.

That too is something to be quite proud about. Men have a reputation often justifiably so that when we are in a relationship that we ultimately only have one thing on our mind. All of the flowers, the candy, the dinners, and the engaging conversation are ultimately about coaxing the young lady to the bedroom. Given that I did not pursue sexual intercourse in any of my dating relationships, I am proof that not all guys are only interested in sex. I wanted companionship.

I wanted to have fun together. I wanted intellectual stimulation. I wanted closeness. But, I expected sex to only happen after matrimony. Yes, there are some guys who are focused on sexual conquest or self-centeredness to getting their own biological urges satisfied. But, there are many guys like I was with a much broader view. By the way, this is a big issue even after you get married.

We husbands have to avoid the trap of coming across as only wanting sex from our wives. We need to give spiritual, emotional, and physical intimacy to have a thriving marriage. There are no memories of prior enjoyable experiences that might leave me disappointed in any aspect of our physical intimacy.

Sure, we have our sexual miscues as does every long-term relationship. My wife and I have had conversations with them over the years about our expectation that they commit themselves to waiting until marriage to have sex. We can speak with authority. Of course, I have no idea if they will heed our advice and prayer. But, they will always know in spite of what the culture presents to them that their parents did it.

In this area as in many others, we want to model our values and our faith to our children and future generations of the Arnold family. It is simply to reflect on my own gratitude and model for those with like values. I grew up seeing parents who slept around, did a lot of drugs and alcohol, and cheater on their spouses so saving yourself for your partner and displaying genuine love is an awesome thing!

I appreciate hearing this from a man because there is so much negative message from and about men on this front.

As a woman, it is great to read an article like this from a man who has intentionally waited, showing that it is possible and what the benefits have been. Thank u for telling everyone that there r major advantages to remaining inactive until a suitable partner is found. I expect my husband to refrain from physical relationship until after marriage, and marriage is by definition when a man signs a legal binding contract in which his responsibilitys forever after r clearly documented in writing, in front of competent witnesses, because that is what is best for his wife and children and men must be held accountable for their actions.

Your email address will not be published. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Facebook Twitter. Reason 8: Never worry about sexually transmitted diseases STDs Given that neither I nor my wife had any sexual partners outside of our marriage, I have literally never in my life worried for one second about contracting a sexually-transmitted disease.

And, so can you. Reason 5: Sense of pride in being obedient to my religious convictions Much of my thinking about premarital sex is rooted in my Christian faith tradition.

Reason 2: My wife is my only frame of reference I have had sex with one woman in my life. And, I enjoy it. James on July 20, at pm. Emanuel on October 28, at pm. So great.

Ken on November 20, at pm. Thanks for sharing, this is really important to hear it from another man. IsQ on December 18, at am. Keags on February 7, at pm. Technno on February 13, at am.

Bay on September 17, at am. Olu on October 8, at pm. This is amazing. Such a good example as a father and husband x Reply. Karo on October 24, at am. I really needed this and God almighty will bless you for sharing Reply. Konne on October 28, at am. A great experience from a man. Submit a Comment Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. While men make this commitment with the good intentions for a fulfilling marriage and sex life, my research indicates that the beliefs about sexuality and gender that come hand in hand with these pledges of abstinence do not necessarily make for an easy transition to a married sexual life.

Here, Behar makes two assumptions. One is that sexual activity declines both with age and the time spent in a relationship. This is true. The second is that abstinence is not something you do before marriage. If we compare these numbers to the average age of first marriage in the United States — 27 for women, and 29 for men — we get the picture: most people are having sex before marriage.

Most of the data that exist on this practice show that those who make the pledges will do so in high school, often by either signing a pledge card or donning a purity ring. Research on this population tells us a few things: that those who pledge are more likely to be young women , and that — regardless of gender — an abstinence pledge delays the onset of sexual activity by only 18 months.

Furthermore, taking a virginity pledge will often encourage other types of sexual behavior. I was curious about how men maintain pledges in light of these statistics, and also balance them with expectations about masculinity. So in , I began researching a support group of 15 men at an Evangelical church in the Southwest. Rather, the men of The River approach sex as something sacred, a gift from God meant to be enjoyed in the confines of the marriage bed. And it is precisely because of these so-called beastly elements that these men find each other in the same space every week.

The men of The River grappled with pornography use, masturbation, lust and same-sex desire, all of which can potentially derail these men from their pledge.

It raises an interesting dilemma: to these men, sex is both sacred and beastly. Yet the way they navigate this seeming contradiction actually allows them to exert their masculinity in line with the demands of Guyland.

Group members had an elaborate network of accountability partners to help them resist temptations. While these behaviors may seem unusual, they work in ways that allow men to actually assert their masculinity. The River, as a support group, works largely in the same way. The men of The River believed that the time and work required to maintain these pledges would pay off in the form of a happy and healthy marriage.

Ciara, in discussing her commitment to abstinence with Russell Wilson, similarly added that she believes such a promise is important for creating a foundation of love and friendship. All but one had gotten married. Respondents reported that they still struggled with the beastly elements of sexuality.

They also had the added concern of extramarital affairs.